Decision Making Paradigm re-evaluated.

 

So while I had hoped that I was done writing about friendships it turns out I am not. 

I have thought about it a lot, re-evaluated my decision making paradigm as it were, and the best I can come up with is that there is nothing for it. Until I can discover what it is about me that makes people either consciously decide they do not want anything to do with me, or at best forget about me, I can’t continue to experience it.

Social media FTW. At least there I can find people with which to interact about the things I enjoy and that I am passionate about. To this end, I do miss Google + a lot. That platform was about passions, about interests. The communities you could join there kept you in contact with others who were interested in the same things. I suppose the closest you can find now would be the sub-reddit’s on Reddit. Though having tried to use Reddit since Google + closed down I would have to say that it is not even close to the same.

I have to admit though, that the friendships I made on Google + seem to have gone the same way as all of my other friendships. I think there is one person left whom I met on G+ that I still have any contact with at all, and its mostly the same as anyone else now. If I reach out, then we talk, when I stop then it stops. 

In the few years I have been on Reddit though I have made no actual friendships (even if you stretch that definition to include a very Facebook definition of friend. It isn’t that kind of community, at least not for me. 

I have decided that if I am going to have to be the one reaching out anyway, it might as well be on social media. There will be both good and bad, compliments and insults, constructive criticism and pointless complaining. In other words, just like being with real people. The benefit? I expect those online to forget I exist since they don’t actually know me anyway. It will be less painful when they don’t respond or otherwise forget about me.

I know that sounds bad, even being written it looks bad. It isn’t though. It is very liberating to have finally made a decision. I can forget about the past and look toward the future. I will be able to share what I need to, get the feedback I desire, both good and bad, without the concern or stress that goes along with an actual physical friendship. Yes, very liberating.

I think I can finally leave this subject behind. Having decided on and then implemented that decision there should be no need to harp on about it any more. Maybe some months from now I might post an update on how my decision is working out for me. Maybe not. 

Anyway, thanks for following along on this convoluted journey of mine and Keep Flying.